Article Bookmarked
Bookmark Removed

Marriage Isn’t Over After Kids


Jan. 23, 2017 Huffington Post

After the kids go to bed, it’s our only real time together.

We pry our own sleepy eyes open and hold hands while watching TV. We make love when we’re exhausted, because it’s our one chance.

He kisses me as he goes out the door to work every morning. We text “I love you” during the day. Sometimes we text angry things we didn’t get to finish talking about before our coffees were finished; before it was time to shower and get dressed for our days spent largely apart.

I stay home with our kids, and this beloved role sometimes feels like it consumes me—I admit it. I love being a mom. I hate being a mom sometimes, too. It’s complex, just like my children—just like people—are, but it’s everything I dreamed it would be, and it’s a billion other things I didn’t expect or wouldn’t choose.

But my marriage is far from over, and our “us” isn’t resigned to past tense.

We do share a history—most couples do. Most couples have a story of their own special romance hidden inside of the 9 to 5, dinner-making, and school bus meeting; tucked inside of a peck of a kiss we wish lasted longer; buried beneath laundry piles.

I admit to wanting a future with more of “us” waiting before the sunset.

I want to know in my heart our kids will only be little for so long, so we’ll cherish and nurture this gentle space in their lifetimes, where we get to be parents, and partners, and a family. I do believe this, but I know also life can be unfair.

I don’t want to save our “us” for someday.

I don’t want to pause our romance for tomorrow.

I don’t want to wait for the weekends to hold a kiss.

We try to fit our “us” into our Mondays, Wednesdays and Thursdays. We try to be the people who met, fell in love, and had children, before finding our love story placed haphazardly underneath a stack of our daughter’s school papers. We try to, but the reality is that life and love are different when you are sleep-deprived, loving parents to small kids.

Read More on Huffington Post

Gene Upshaw Player Assistance Trust Fund

Apply Today

All Resources

Tell Me More

Letting Go of the Past

Much of who you are is tied to your past experiences.

Read More

Jackie Burkett: Former football great loses battle with leukemia

His legacy was more than football — being a county commissioner, being involved in so many organizations, the All Sports Association — just anywhere he could serve.

Read More

The Next Generation of You: Jim Thrower

Our series on former NFL player transitions continues as we shift our focus to Detroit.

Read More

Happy Labor Day!

We appreciate all of your hard work.

Read More

20 Franchises You Can Launch for Less Than $50,000

Be your own boss for less than you think.

Read More

Poor Sleep Associated With Higher Risk Of Chronic Pain

You could be at double or triple the risk if you don’t get proper sleep.

Read More

Sell Your House Faster With These 6 House Flipping Tactics

Work it like a professional for a quick sale at a great price.

Read More

New Study Offers Support for Prostate Testing

Screening tests could reduce prostate cancer deaths by 25 to 32 percent.

Read More