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15 Habits That Are Costing You Happiness

Aug. 17, 2016 Huffington Post

1. Comparing yourself to others.

Comparison has been called the thief of joy and for good reason — every minute you spend wishing you were someone else is a minute of your own life wasted. Comparing yourself to others also misses the whole point of your life — to be you, a once-in-humankind blend of gifts, passions and quirks. Stop looking at others and focus on being you and blossoming into YOUR best self.

2. Trying to give to others without giving to yourself.

Buddha once said: You as much as anyone in the entire Universe deserve your love and affection.

He was right. While it is a noble and beautiful thing to want to give to others — the truth is that you can’t give what you don’t have. If you haven’t filled yourself up by spending time alone with your soul, doing the things you love, and praising and appreciating yourself, you will be trying to pour love from an empty cup.

3. Focusing on lack instead of abundance.

It’s easy to look at your life, wardrobe or bank balance and focus on what you don’t have — instead of what you do. If you’re reading this, you already have at least one huge miracle to be grateful for — you woke up today. Switch your lens from lack to abundance and notice the magic surrounding you — fresh air to breathe, food to eat, clothing to wear, the beauty of nature, and endless opportunities for connection, creativity and love. See the miracle of life.

4. Waiting for the day when you finally arrive.

Many of us put our happiness on hold until a day in the future when we are more and have more. There are two problems with this — this very moment is your precious life and should not be overlooked or undervalued; and there will never be a day where you have it all because your soul is constantly expanding and will always give birth to new goals and desires. Decide to be happy with where you are and what you have now — it’s the best decision you’ll ever make, and paradoxically, it will magnetise more blessings and success into your life.

5. Numbing your emotions.

It can be tempting to run away from feelings of sadness, emptiness or discontent — turning instead to the television, food or alcohol. But the truth is if you numb the hard feelings you also numb the good — your heart is the centre of pain but it is also the centre of joy, excitement, passion, inspiration, gratitude and love.

Next time a challenging feeling arises — have compassion for yourself and let it be there without judgment. If you focus on the sensations you are feeling — and not the mental story your mind wants to tell about what it all means — the feeling will soon pass through your body like a cloud passing by in the sky.

6. Letting the world define what success means to you.

There is no one-size-fits-all approach to life because every soul is unique. The only way to know what to do with your life is to look within and see what lights you up – follow your intuition and joy and passion. If you try to meet society’s definition of success, you may end up successful but unhappy. Is that really true success? Design a life that feels good on the inside, not one that looks good on the outside.

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